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Very Well

This is definitely one of mot more favorite flash series here on NG, but you could use some tweaks.
Some more principles of animation and design could be applied. more on the design stand point than the animation. Much of your backgrounds are too clean, you gotta rough them up a little, makes them more realistic, same with a few aspects of your characters.
Lastly I have a slight issue with the voices in this one. usually I don't have any complainants. But this time it seems like your voices were just saying the lines, they weren't putting any feeling in to them. You gotta fix this, fast.

other than that great story, I hope to see more, and soon.

not bad

but you could use some better art. it's great you got in to buttons and all but none of that is going to matter if you don't put more time and effort in to your art.
also you need to tighten up your comedy a little. Right now it's loos and hardly funny. I kind of like the pokeball skit, but the voice in it kind of killed it for me.


More time and effort in to the work.
better jokes/writing
practice, a lot.
good luck on your next one

timoku responds:

yeah sorry my voice does suck

it looked good

But thats it. the cracking in the audio just completely destroyed the entire thing.
I thought the character designs were ok and the music kind of worked (again back to the cracking). also I cold live with the slide show/story boarding kind of play through.
fix the audio and turn it down a little. you'll ghet a much better score3

Bout Time

Damn guys took you long enough to get it out.
great collab

not bad

Needs some tweaks though.
First no loops, I know it's short, but loops kind of suck, you really need a start and finish with some buttons.
Second make sure you use all the space given or cuttit down to the desired size. the white bars on the side just really harm the entire thing.
still quite good though, and I do like it. but these two things really hurt the score. so fix it up and do another

muscleman2008 responds:

thanks 4 the advice

Voice acting

sadly the voice does not fit the character. and sadly that damages the whole animation.
But I must say the art was good, and the animation it's self was alright. There are a few teaks that are needed though. For starters the eye of the Chimera when it opens could use some work cause it just looks like it's scaled from the bottom of the eye which really hurts the effect.

Also I think you should have placed a little more to the story.
So far it seems like we have a Griffin mad scientist trying to create a chimera, obviously he wants it to be evil and wreak havoc, but thats not enough, you should elaborate more. if you really don't have any more story then you should back up a little and maybe show him going threw the process of creating the creature.

in conclusion, better voice, tweak the animation effects a little, a little more story.
Strong points. Solid artwork, decent animation, somewhat funny concept. good character designs.

Good luck

Really thats all?

I though more joined than that. it was still kind of cool getting to see it unfold on the art forum and all. Cool stuff guys.

it was ok

i give half cause it was an alright reel, but if your going to rely on stick figures anywhere, and I mean anywhere, then don't ever expect a job. most professional artist and critics would laugh you out of the room and burn your demo on the spot the first second they even see the hint of stick figure animation.
so pulls those stick animations out of your reel and you might stand a remote chance.

Great job

made me smile
I would have laughed if I wasn't in class.

I'm usually not a stick fan to be honest but you made this work well enough that it was good.
the music was a good choice and the ending was abrupt and funny. The pace worked really well.
if it wasn't a stick you would have recived a 10, but either way you have earned a favorite from me.

Jectoons responds:

thanks a lot,
it was an experiment on fbf and climbing animation, so... the easiest thing to do is a stickman :D

good gag

but it needed more,
the punchline wasn't that strong, so it could used more.
also a start and stop would have been better than a loop.
good stuff though

If you think you have what it takes, then come at me. I'll enjoy this.

34, Male

Graphic Artist

Art Institite of Phoenix


Joined on 9/9/06

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